When I grew up in the deep south, we called our evening meal supper, and reserved the term “dinner” for fancy meals.
This week a special guest joined me for supper. I set the table with mats and napkins, and placed three candles in my favorite wooden candle sticks made by my dad many years ago. I bring them out every fall, and always think of Daddy fondly. I did not put cute little pumpkins on the napkins. The heat index has been over 100 in Columbia, and my imagination wouldn’t stretch that far!
My special guest was…..my husband. The meal wasn’t fancy, but it was something we both like. Veggie burgers with goat cheese (“cheddar block” from Trader Joe’s), quinoa salad, chips and watermelon were on the menu.
I decided to share our supper and also some thoughts on honoring my husband, Tom. If you’re married, I encourage you to see your spouse with fresh eyes. It is quite natural to take each other for granted and to live a mundane existence together. The person we know best and love the most ends up with the dregs of our effort and emotion. We must remember that love is action and doesn’t depend on our feelings.
We’re in a unique stage of marriage. For the first time in my life, I feel free to choose how I spend time. I work occasionally as a stager and organizer, but not as often now that I’m in Columbia. As I’ve prayed, God continues to confirm my current priorities:
- Spend focused time in God’s word and prayer.
- Support my husband.
- Create a warm home for us and others.
- Show hospitality and make friends.
- Write my blog and begin my book.
- Continue to mentor women.
God directed us here when Tom landed a great position at a large city hospital. We didn’t want to leave Wilmington, but if we hadn’t moved, our life would be quite different now. Tom and I would still be immersed in our personal pursuits and responsibilities; all things that we enjoyed individually. Those things (and people) that busied us were the very reasons we didn’t want to move. If you’ve read much of what I’ve written in the last few years, you’ve heard, about 100 times, how hard my move from home was.
Retrospect is a gift, but why does it take so long?
Tom and I hope to eventually end up back in Wilmington. But, today I’m thankful that God knows better than we do. I’m glad he’s had a plan for us since before we were born. In addition to Tom’s job, God knew that we needed this focused time together to enhance our relationship and to prepare us for what’s to come. I don’t love getting older 🙂 but I appreciate the clearer view from here.
It’s been fun to celebrate my husband. I’ve had showers and parties for hundreds of folks over the years, and if I can throw events for friends and even people I don’t know well, I can make supper a bit more special for Tom. He has loved me and put up with me all this time, and it’s a pleasure to give him the love and focus he deserves. I’m so grateful for him.
Love at first sight is easy to understand; it’s when two people have been looking at each other for a lifetime that it becomes a miracle.
Here’s an easy recipe that you can adapt to your taste.
Cook in rice cooker or pan: 1 Cup quinoa and 2 Cups water.
Chop any of these items and add to quinoa:
Red, yellow or orange peppers
Red onion or scallions
Cucumbers (I prefer the small ones with skin)
Drained and rinsed can of black beans or chick peas
Juice of two limes (or use dressing of your choice)
Feta or goat cheese (optional)